Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Gained a bit of weight

I have gained quite a few pounds!

I'm much more stout than I have ever been.  I think I gained at least 20 pounds in the last year.

I haven't been the same since my diagnosis.
I definitely let myself go.
I stopped going to the gym.
Been eating lots of carbs, mostly for comfort.

I've also lost interest in sex.
I just lost my sex drive altogether.
Part of it is the guilt I have of passing on the virus.

I feel like a diseased pariah.
And didn't think of myself as attractive to anyone anymore.

I bought new pairs of pants since most of my pants no longer fit.
I also bought larger shirts, T-shirts too.

I need to get my act together.

If I don't start taking better care of myself,
I have a feeling that HIV may not be the thing that will kill me.

I might die of a heart attack instead!


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